Thoughts on Subtext and Feeling Old

chekhovJ BearI received a gift in the mail from my friend Bunniey, who sometimes keeps the *most random* stuff. She has been going through a lot of it (future minimalist? probably a stretch, but maybe!), and she included a few silly memories from when we were in college together. One was the playbill from my senior project- I directed and acted in a play (I did have help with the direction- directing yourself is not so awesome).

I took one look at it and thought OMG I can’t believe they didn’t flunk me. It isn’t completely captured here, but it is nuts how much technology and expectations have changed since 2002. It was seriously a white piece of copy paper, printed on both sides. It wasn’t even in color, no cool graphics, just a fuzzy picture from Microsoft clip art. At the time, I thought it looked pretty good. Oh, and also, I couldn’t even put the clip art in behind the text myself, a boyfriend did it for me. Now I have a blog, and a real job where I make things look prettier than that just for notes to myself that I throw in the recycling later…

The part about this that is really interesting to me though- I still feel this way about Chekhov. I didn’t remember writing this, hadn’t thought about that moment or play in years. However, it all came flooding back; the beauty of the words and the subtext. There is so much there that influenced me. The art of being mysterious, of saying it all while actually saying nothing, is my favorite part about acting. This probably overflows a bit too much into my daily life, but I think we all do it constantly without even realizing it. I am often accused of being too expressive, and I think this is where I get it. Do you think it’s fair to blame acting? Probably not 🙂