Warning: if cleanses or detoxes of any sort may trigger you, this would be a great time to stop reading this and go to the Shiba category and look at cute animals!

*******************************************************************************

I wanted to do a cleanse, but not a full on one because those turn me into a crazy person. I think it’s a little beyond my mental capacity right now. My real goal is to get myself off sugar. Every time I eat something with very much sugar I feel like garbage, but I can’t stop eating it! There’s always chocolate at work, J keeps sugary snacks at home- and I have no self control even though I know it makes me feel gross.

The guidelines of my cleanse are no added sugar (fruit is okay), no alcohol, no caffeine, and extra fruits and veggies. I already don’t eat meat, and I limit dairy and eggs. I’m doing smoothies at work, because I need to go cold turkey if I’m going to get off this sugar habit. Basically, I’m doing a cleanse like BluePrint, but I’m making up my own rules and not spending $65 a day (I’m sure they’re lovely people, but come on. really?!). I’m also doing smoothies instead of juice because for me, cutting the fiber out of my food seems silly. I don’t understand why people drink juice and laxative tea, when they could just leave the fiber in their juice… anyway, I’m digressing. So I made three smoothies on Sunday night, roughly following this recipe. I used mostly spinach, with banana, cherries, and water. Then I made two protein shake/smoothies. I used half water and half unsweetened coconut milk, plus one serving of protein powder and 2/3 cup of mango. This is what I had throughout the day on Monday, though I didn’t drink the third green smoothie. Then I ate a normal dinner, but without dessert or alcohol. I did the same thing yesterday. It has been hard to resist sweets, but it’s easier for me when I flat out tell myself it IS NOT an option. I will continue for a week or until I start to feel like I will drown in smoothies. I think that a week is a good goal. I actually started on Sunday, so I just have to make it through Saturday! After three days of this, I am still very close to last week’s weight. This is probably good, I am filling my body with nutrients and not losing water weight.

I had my first (of three) personal training sessions last night! She kept having to cancel, so I was really losing motivation. Now it’s back! It’s back because it was a wake up call in a big way. The set up was probably the worst possible scenario for someone that is seeking personal training because they are unhappy with their body. One wall is mirrors, two walls are floor windows that go to the parking lot and sidewalk. Anyone in the world can watch. I know that no one cares, but it’s still hard to not feel like you’re in a fishbowl. I also have been avoiding truly looking at my body, and the outfit I chose, the mirrors, and the lighting did not allow me to hide anymore.I need to get serious so I can feel better about myself, and feel better in general.

You may be wondering how my yoga is going. It’s not. I meant to start Sunday, but was so sick and slept for as much of the day as possible. Then Monday came and I remembered I had personal training Tuesday and wouldn’t be able to go Tuesday. Thus, I decided to start tonight so I can try to go seven days in a row. I really need to drag my slacker self over there. Part of it is anxiety- I hate going into a new class. The other part is I hate leaving Riley the puppy bear 🙂

Note: I use Arbonne protein powder (this is an affiliate link- if you buy this I will get a small percentage). It is vegan, gluten free, soy free, has no artificial sweeteners, and tastes like cake batter. I’ve only tried the vanilla, but it’s good with everything. Arbonne is one of those weird club things. If you or someone you know is in the club, you should definitely buy it from there because it’s cheaper. Sometimes I do that, but if I can’t get on board with someone else’s order I get it off Amazon. I thought I would mention it because it’s so hard to find vegan protein powder, and this is the only one I’ve ever liked. A lot of people like Sun Warrior, but I can’t stand it. It feels like sand in my mouth.

Happy Wednesday!

Jillian